So Close!

I love taking photos. Seriously, it’s one of those things that never seems to get old. It’s pretty crazy seeing how close to one-hundred I am. Recently I went through a rough time. Nothing really bad happened, I just started feeling overwhelmingly anxious. Two weeks ago I had my first panic attack. You wanna know what caused it? I thought my eyebrows looked ugly. From there I spiraled into much darker topics.

My anxiety has always made me feel like I’ve had to be the best at everything I do. That might sound like motivation to you, but it was actually quite paralyzing for me. I always felt like my best wasn’t good enough so why even try. I stopped taking photos because mine were never the best.

Recently I have just stopped caring. That may sound bad, but it has been pretty freeing. I’m taking photos because that makes me happy, and I really don’t care how they compare to others. Talent is kinda over-rated. I don’t think people should care about how good they are at doing something, as long as they enjoy it. Sing even if you’re not in tune, write things nobody wants to read, play pool and scratch up the felt! I’ve learned that you’re probably the only one who cares.

I even managed to put one of my photos on Instagram.

"With freedom, books, flowers, and the moon, who could not be happy?"-Oscar Wilde

A post shared by Natalie Lonabaugh (@nlona2507) on

I was really surprised that people appreciated my photo. It made me really happy. I bet there are hundreds of photos of wet flowers and hundreds of people with cameras who could take an identical if not better photo than mine. I don’t really care. I’m proud of my work.

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